Too much control I've allowed it to take,
The thought of going without makes me fear I will break.
Mentally enslaved, left always wanting more,
Somehow I have allowed the devil to walk through my door.
My mind has been manipulated, the fear holds me in place.
But I realize the high is nothing but a chase.
The jealousy I feel that you are now clean,
I swear it makes me more of a fiend.
How do I fix this with my mind clouded with doubt.
I want to live my life going without.
The strength I will find, but I hope it comes soon,
Because the path I am on will lead me doomed.
James take my hand and show me the way.
Show me your strength and carry me through,
I am so sorry my recovery replies solely on you.